A sister once called me crying that her boyfriend dumbed her and would not tell her what she did wrong. Something in me said that he had an affair, and you know what? It was exactly that because he confessed it a few days later.
What I have learnt is that when people reject us, we tend to blame ourselves for it. In extreme cases other people would easily get into any next worse relationship in attempt to feel loved and to regain their self-worth. We start trying to change ourselves to fit into the rejecters’ perceived expectations and standards. But the Lord wants to stop you from damaging yourself because of other people’s issues when they walk out on you.
1 John 2:19 KJV They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would no doubt have continued with us: but they went out, that they might be made manifest that they were not all of us.
In other words, be relieved when the imposters leave you! I have heard many people who have been rejected by supposedly “good” people crying that “but he was a man of God” or “he knew scriptures left and right”…. Let me tell you a story:-
In tertiary, a Christian brother/pastor who studies Theology, was voted to be an SRC president but later was suspended for money theft. I was shocked because the brother came across holy and disciplined because before the SRC elections, he lead a disciplinary excommunication of another brother who committed fornication in church.
On the 15th April this year, newspapers around the world were reporting “KZN/SA man accused of US killing spree”. When I recognized the picture of the accused, I trembled in fear and disbelieve. My heart was very broken when reading about all the ruthless murders, theft and bank robberies in the USA which Mr SRC President confessed to have committed.
Friends, I am not trying to expose someone’s wrong but to caution us that we must not trust a person because they are “a man/woman of God” or they know scriptures. We cannot afford to be unwise Christians anymore and if we make mistakes by inviting wrong people into our lives, God will expose them or allow them to leave/reject us prior to future disasters. It is not easy to fake your true identity for a long time. You do not know the person’s heart, so even if they are a man/woman of God leaving you, let them go!
Let them go! Whether they were your everything or not, or they were people you looked up to or trusted. Let them go! They did not belong to you, had they did, they would have stayed! Don’t even try to stop them or convince them otherwise. It’s painful but let them go!
During my first week at Bible college, I used to call my girlfriend after class to excitingly share the amazing revelations that we were being taught. One day while I was sharing with her, she interrupted me with a loud voice, “enough! I had enough of it. I don’t like it. I am ok with just being a normal Christian, receiving normal teaching, I don’t want to hear those things. I can’t do this anymore!” This shocked me because I’ve known her for years long before we started dating. She was someone whose life was centred around church and school. We were both Christians but with different visions and so we had to break up.
So, sometimes God would bring certain situations in your relationship to allow you to see that the person you are with is heading into a different direction than you. You must let them go and not necessarily because there is something wrong with them but because they are not yours. You must also be happy when you are rejected by wrong people because I hear that some people fall into a trap of marrying a wrong person.
King Xerxes’ was married to a wrong woman, Vashti, whom He banished for disrespecting him.
Esther 1:12 NLT But when they conveyed the king's order to Queen Vashti, she refused to come. This made the king furious, and he burned with anger.
Generally, we relate rejection to women or the poor but in my world, I have met more rejected men than women including famous people too, in fact I believe famous are the most rejected. People tend to open up to me even on the first day we meet and I can tell you that I have heard many disturbing stories from young and very old men, poor and rich, famous and even ministers of God. I believe rejection is worse for a man because men are typically not trained to deal with emotions. A man’s life revolves around his ego and women have the fatal power to destroy it. I just recently read from Tim & Beverly LaHaye’s The Act of Marriage that in extreme cases, men’s sexual drive and impotency (or fertility) can be affected by romantic rejection. One of the adverse Psychological consequences of rejection is aggression. Men generally become aggressive than being depressed as compared to women. King Xerxes was “furious and burnt with anger” when he was rejected
.
Esther 2:1-2 NLT But after Xerxes' anger had subsided, he began thinking about Vashti and what she had done and the decree he had made.
Memories of people who rejected us would usually visit and attempt to haunt or depress us in order to hinder us from moving forward. But get up and keep going forward (Phil 3:13). The above verse also teaches that it is not good to make decisions while one is still under emotions such as anger.
Esther 2: 2 & 4 NLT (2) So his personal attendants suggested, "Let us search the empire to find beautiful young virgins for the king.
(4) After that, the young woman who most pleases the king will be made queen instead of Vashti." This advice was very appealing to the king, so he put the plan into effect.
A lot of people usually give up hope when they are rejected. It is particularly more difficult for women because it gets more difficult to get a partner as they grow but please don’t lose hope. The imposter’s departure should not affect your destiny. Again, it is wise to get advice and a good counsel . Don’t roll solo but seek second opinion from people that God assigned to you for advice.
Esther 10:1-2 NLT King Xerxes imposed a tribute throughout his empire, even to the distant coastlands. (2) His great achievements and the full account of the greatness of Mordecai, whom the king had promoted, are recorded in The Book of the History of the Kings of Media and Persia.
As many of us know the story, King Xerses married the well-mannered beautiful Esther and as shown in the scripture above, he was more prosperous with the help of Mordecai ( Esther’s guardian cousin).
So guys, it is good that certain people leave us and although it causes us pain, God brings the right people that lead us into prosperity and happiness. So, please let the wrong people go!
No comments:
Post a Comment